3 months later......

Well this is typical me, the G thing turned into a relationship & is about to end. Its a shame really as even though I think she is pretty disfunctional I actually really like her.

As I type this I am having a beer & contemplating the fact that another relationship is probably over so how did I get here ?

The 1st month...It really was good we got on just fine. I think that we both thought we had found some one serious & we where basically enjoying each other.

Month 2... We where seeing more & more of each other & would regularly spend the weekends together. Looking back I can see that things where a bit strained..

My birthday, I got really drunk (2 months into the relationship) & told her I loved her, apparently (I am ashamed to admit) I even asked her what song we would play at our wedding. Obviously this would have been a great time for her to tell me she loved me & all would have been well but no. So I felt like an idiot & was aware that things were not 100%.

We had arranged to go away for a long weekend so 2 weeks later we did just that. This was to be 2 days of just us followed by 2 days of friends & family. Things didn't get off to a good start with her having a bit of a wobble on morning number 1 about me being too loud & sweary (which I can be). Apart from that we had a great time doing things that we both like, walking, cycling etc. I was then introduced to 14 members of family & friends & G started acting quite distant. Basically she would be in a flap running round organising things & generally ignoring me. Not good, I left the weekend after having some great fun but also feeling less than happy about the state of our relationship.

So another 2 weeks pass & I'm off again a wedding reception. It was a bit weird as she was at the wedding & I joined her in the evening. I arrived and she instantly said something negative about the way I was dressed. We went for a walk & got over that. After a few drinks she & a friend started dancing & asking me to dance. I got up & started dancing & she freaked out saying not to dance with her but just dance with everyone. I mean really freaking out here & it pissed me off, but we talked & got over it. She was actually being really nice to me, showing affection & making sure I wasn't left alone etc. Next thing (no 3 ) she slipped off my lap & landed on the floor. Again another massive massive freak out. I was pissed off by this point & swore at her, told her to get a grip, no one saw, she wasn't hurt & it really didn't matter.

So the next day in the car we reflected about the previous night & agreed that it was fun but seemed like too much effort. I asked her if she wanted to be with me & she was unable to say yes. Its been a weird day as she has bee hugging me & we even tried to go sit in the park together but it was too weird. She doesn't know if she wants to be with me. She says she feels awkward as we are so different (she talks properly & is a bit posh). I do accept that there is a difference but it doesn't bother me as much. I have told her I need an answer as to whether we stay together or not & she is going to call me tomorrow. I left with her crying & I myself stayed composed, I'm pretty sure its the end of the relationship & its probably good thing as its all been too much hard work. Shame as I really enjoyed her company & now its back to square 1. I feel pretty crap right now but a beer is chilling me out. I really need to move house fuck me I have lived in this place far too long , I need a change badly......

I need to add this for my own sanity. Sex was pretty crap & she was terrible at blow jobs, great tits though, hmmmmmm

Next !

Date 4 - G

I txt G on Saturday morning & we arranged to meet later that evening.

After arriving at the pub things were a bit awkward. The pub was absolutely rammed and the best we could manage was to find a little place to stand. Thankfully soon enough a sofa became available & we started chatting. the we moved again to a decent spot, had a couple of drinks & things started going smoothly.

I started flirting with her & playing a game where we admitted our sexual likes taking it in turns, me stockings her bums etc. She seems to be into it one minute & then offended the next so I kept cooling it off & talking about normal things.

Then I came back from the loo & sat next to her. This was the start of some serious flirting & I looked at her thinking I would love to fuck her brains out. She was fully aware of this & was laughing & telling me to stop etc. Eventually though she leaned in & gave me a big snog. 5t was great - not the snog but the evening. That kind of heavy flirting followed by the pay off is such a buzz !

We went back to hers & had sex a few times over the evening. She was actually really nice, lots of hugging & chatting everything was nice & easy. She txt me yesterday evening & the vibe I get is she's up for some kind of ongoing arrangement. What she or I want from this remains to be seen but some more sex would be very nice indeed !

Meanwhile gorgeous girl J from Wednesday has been in touch & we are meeting tonight (Monday). Yes its all a bit busy but I am unavailable for a week after tonight so I had to squeeze her in.

The of course I'm off on my little break on Thursday with the prospect of shagging a different girl (SJ). Yes I seem to have many options right now. It never rains but it pours !

Dating trilogy wrap up.

Date 1 gorgeous amazing can't fault her, 2 & 3 not that bothered.

I called date 1 yesterday & left a message, she hasn't returned my call yet but always took a while to respond when we where organising our meet. I haven't given up yet.....

So the big question, "is internet dating worth it.

This week has cost me 3 nights out 1 of which was amazing 2 of which where ok. So you need time to do it. Financially I've spent a bit on buying food & drink for 2 dates & my own food/drink for the last. This has probably added up to about £80.

So I guess finance is the biggest cost which is ok for me. Non f these girls expect to eat, its always my suggestion & I don't mind paying, so no problem there.

The only time it gets depressing is if you are silly enough to build up your own expectations & the are disappointed when you meet. I have learned the hard way not to do that.

Conclusion

I have met a very gorgeous girl who I would love to try & have a relationship with and had a couple of nights entertainment.

So yes at this point I think it is worth it. Meanwhile G has been texting again & wants to go out for a drinkt, this will be a "real life" date as far as I am concerned as I met her through a friend. I would say we have a good chance of hitting it off & will sort something out soon.....

Date 3

This was triathlon girl H.

I now realise that writing about these dates is going to be hard work because generally they all follow the same format. Meet drink - eat - home. I have in the past had the exception which throws in shag at the end of it but not this week.

She was easy to talk to & quite good looking but super super fit. Its a bit weird sitting across from a women with more arm muscle than I can ever imagine having.

Anyway we chatted, it was pretty easy & then went to eat. She is an amazing sports woman & really interesting. Great ass & funny, very competitive. I must admit I felt a bit inadequate sitting across from a girl who is so fit .

I'm not sure if we should see each other again or not or whether she would want to anyway....

Date 2

The girl from the singles night.

Met in a pub had a couple of drinks & went on for a burger somewhere.

On the face of it the evening was exactly the same as yesterdays but it was oh so different. She is pretty good looking & a little bit flirty. We chatted but it was pretty strained in places, we flirted, I would definitely like to fuck her.

But & here's the but, I know I would get bored of her very quickly. Now the best thing to do will be to not see her again so hope fully one of the others will pan out.

Mean while I have had a text from another friend of a friend from the singles night G. She asked me out for a drink tonight & I said another time, yes she wants it in the bottom :) She's actually quite nice, not my normal type but who knows, will be fun !

Wednesday's date - J

So date 1 of 3 over with & oh my god, this girl is absolutely beautiful. Stunningly pretty, I had to stop myself staring at her ....

We went to a nice pub, I rode the motorbike so couldn't drink. Had a couple of shandy's then dinner & chatted loads. I wonder if I was a bit manic or over excited who knows. I paid & she forgot to say thanks so called to apologise afterwards. I said she can make it up by buying next time so woohay !

Grrrr I would certainly love to get her in bed , man I need to go out properly with her & get pissed soon !

5 Weeks 3 days

So the singles dating night went ok. It was organised by a friend of a friend & I was asked to go along. Basically lots of single people, milling around & having a drink then dinner. My mission was to find my celebrity wife, I had my own celebrity alias, think , Bonny & Clyde.

I got chatting to 3 girls, one of whom was the very attractive wife. After the evening I mailed all 3 & she got in touch & we fixed a date for this Thursday.

Things are pretty busy this week as I have another date with a very good looking black or maybe mixed
girl arranged for tomorow (Wednesday), she sounds nice but maybe a little bit quiet. I also have a date with a "famous" trathlete on Friday night, she sounds great & we should have plenty to talk about. So its date mania for the next 3 nights.....

So work wise, very cute J has been relegated back to non crush status.

Cafe girl is going out with a disaster of a man, I think I could get her but it would be very messy as he also works at the same place.

I have a trip to Sweden planned for the end of next week. I am going to see a girl who I nearly hooked up with a few years ago. The trip is about getting away but if there's any chance of a little fun I will be more than up for it !

New girl at work is J, great tits very cute & highly fuckable, lets see how long she stays in my thoughts for ..........

How long will it be before I get some sex ! 5 weeks is plenty long enough really !

Don't get me wrong, I'm very happy in myself but I do love the pleasures of the flesh, lets see what these 3 dates bring.

26 days in - update

Yep its been 26 days & things are getting tough....

C, She didn't get back to me after the date & eventually txt me saying she wasn't interested. Net dating is very weird, I thought we would see each other again. This makes me think that i must do something wrong on these dates. In "real life" if I go out with a girl and we have a really fun evening the chances are she will want to to see me again. This is not the case with net dates, I never can tell & seem to have judged it wrong yet again.

I am now officially desperate for a shag, I need good old dirty sex. I am just dying to fuck the brains out of some girl. Its a nightmare there are women everywhere at work & I just look at them & think about fucking them. Things that would normally pass through my brain in a few moments now stick for days. I saw a TV clip with a woman swaying her tits about in the street. I can't get it out of my head ! I need tits in my face asap, fuck ! I went 7 months without sex once I can't imagine doing that now.

So the contenders

Internet girl who just blatantly offers me sex all the time (K) has been blown out. She keeps going on about men pissing on her & its just wrong. Apart from anything else if she is as stupid as she seems to be then she won't be using condoms & I do not want some disease or even HIV off some skanky girl. I've deleted her from facebook & will ignore her calls.

So cute girl at work( J), I seem to be developing a crush on her. I don't think about sex with her & this is a sure sign that I like her. She is so innocent & sweet. I just want to grab her & hug her when I see her at work. I know she has trouble with her mum being ill as well & this just makes me want to look after her & protect her. The sad thing is that I just seem to fuck relationships up & make girl miserable so maybe I should just stay the fuck away, this girl has enough problems.....

Cafe girl, is very cute & kinda flirty, I just have to be careful at work. I really can't be seen to be shagging girls left right & centre.

Anyway that will do for the minute. Its the dating thing on thursday so we will see. Must be some chance to get laid, surely !

C The date

So we met yesterday (wednesday). First thing was I walked up to the wrong girl & said hi C ! She looked at me confused & said nothing so I repeated C ? She then firmly shook her head & looked kind of worried. Oh well, that the 1st & hopefully the last time that happens !

So the date, we met & there was the usual nervous conversation about the weather until we got settled & a bit of drink inside us. The things got really easy & we where chatting for a couple of hours. She has very similar interests to me & we talked about travel & music & generally had a laugh. So after a couple of hours we went & had Thai food & shared a bottle of wine.

No snog at the end of the night but all went well & I would think we will see each other again. You never know though, I have called her this evening & left a message, lets see what happens.......

Meanwhile I have another couple of girls mailed me so we'll see what happens there.


Ex GF is still depressed & at work, trying to get my attention, that is so over. Also I've been invited to a speed dating night next week but its for 25-40 year olds, mmmmm thats a high age bracket, then again I do need a shag soon, its been 3 weeks !

Date next wednesday with C

So I spoke on the phone with C tonight for the 1st time. Her dating membership is over after 3 months but she dropped me her mail address & we got in touch.

She seems nice & I'm sure we will have plenty to talk about over a drink. We both like theme parks, the same music & were born in the same town. I have seen plenty of pics on facebook and she has seen mine, so we know what we're dealing with.

I will meet her next Wednesday.........

Ratios

I am going to try to work out the ratio of e-mails to relationships.

So this must be broken down into 2 categories.

Girls I mail & girls who mail me. This is because if a girl has mailed you then she is likely to want to take it further. I think its an empowerment thing. They want to feel that they can choose some one off the net & have them if they want them.

The odds are higher if you mail younger/prettier girls wo are obviously bombarded with mails constantly. My technique is to copy paste a 4 line mail & if I can be bothered add a little personal statement in the middle about their profile. Sometimes its just the straight copy/paste mail. OK lets be honest here, I have everything saved, job, work, interests etc. It just makes sense, the 1st few mails are often the same so why not just copy the same blurb from a word document. So that gives me a 3 catogories.

1, Girls who mail me.

2, Girls I mail with a standard no personal opening.

3, Girls I mail with a personalised opening.

Now this is sounding very cynical but time to put some numbers in & update this as we go. I did a batch of un-personalised mails the other day so lets see what I got back from that, these where young pretty girls & it was Christmas time when people are with friends & family not worrying about internet dating but anyway.

I sent 13 emails to young 23 - 26 pretty girls, out of these only
4 have been read (some people have not subscribed & can't read mail until they pay up.
1 has replied.

So we are at 13 to one so far but I have probably only put an hour of effort into this & got the attention of a good looking young lady. So lets follow this up & try to real her in.............

30/12/08 I have mailed her back, its too early to ask her out & I'm not sure if I really like her but she is 24 & I like young girls.

The friends ex visits

So, she comes round & we drink, smoke weed, watch DVD's & listen to music. Basically have the best time. It couldn't have been more fun. She says some thing about us being each others back up plan, "It wouldn't be that bad at all" she says. This makes me think that she still has feelings.

I want her to stay, but only for the night, I am unable to commit to this girl for some reason. We tried last year & for a while we where in love & it was great, then it just fizzled out. I blame her ex partly, it is weird lying next to your mates ex gf but I don't think that was it entirely.

She doesn't look like the sort of girl I dream of being with.

Fuck is that it !

Is the reason behind my lack of commitment simply that I do not envisage being with a girl like her in the future. I guess it is, maybe all men have this certain idea about the sort of woman they will end up with.

I can't help but look at women & wonder what they would be like as mothers & how our lives might be in the future. This is unfortunately where she falls down again. She is very young acting & pretty needy, this is a massive turn off. A classic daddies girl who has been in relationships all her life. This girl is fun fun fun but ultimately needs the support of a man.

So unfortunately she does not fit my idea about what my long term partner/wife will be like.

The next day I pick her up & drop her off at her boyfriends on the way to my friend. He is now jealous & a little short (well he is a short ass with a funny walk). I guess I should care, but really I get off on this sort of power. He doesn't really like her anyway so I don't care too much about upsetting him slightly. Anyway, nothing has happened between us, yet.........

On a very eggs/basket note. I called a new net girl C & got answer phone, she txt back later saying she will call, we will see.

The latest girl friend

So lets try & keep this very short

We met on a work trip abroad
She complimented me loads
We fell for each other on face book chat
This was a real girl not some internet date
Went out for a drink (her doing)
Shagged
Started seeing each other

It was great but

She was engaged to be married in 8 months (dress bought, venue booked).


Anyway, things where great until…..

She left him
Things went crap
I though it was because of the split but it wasn't..........

She was continually depressed & negative after the split. Apparently I was the only thing that had made her happy ever, until they split. After the split I was given the boyfriend role. She would complain about me & tell me how pissed off she was. In my opinion all she needed was someone to have an affair with to cheer her up, she even hinted this might happen.

It became extremely obvious that she liked to drink a bit too much and had a life long history of depression. We had numerous fallouts & I couldn't do anything right. I was convinced I was in love with her & she was "The one, no 2". Things came to a head when after hearing about my less than perfect upbringing she said she would "spit in my parents face" if they ever met.

This was basically inexcusable so I dumped her & went on holiday. I missed her & after a month we tried again. We dated 4 times, she was miserable throughout. After my work party she complained non stop about the lack of taxis & made my life miserable for 2 hours while we tried to get home. We are not talking about a little moan here, we are talking 2 hours of constant drunken f'ing & binding.

I decided to dump her then. It took a few more dates but sure enough she had to go. I heard a familiar excuse. I was over sensitive, this is what a previous girl friend used to tell me. Well if getting offended about people threatening to spit in your parents face means you're over sensitive then put me at the top of the list.

Strange, for a few weeks I really though she was it, we would have babies & be happy ever after. This was not lust, it was love she was it, I had found the one !

6 months later I nearly forgot to add it to the blog.

Next!

Net dating rules

Well I just found this

http://ezinearticles.com/?10-Online-Dating-Rules-You-Cannot-Afford-To-Break-If-You-Want-To-Avoid-Bad-Guys-Online&id=1011119

This is pretty scary stuff ! If there are any women psycho enough to come to my work & ask for me & drive by my house then I definitely do not want to meet them !

These all seem a bit women orientated so lets lay down some similar rules.

1, Never never arrange a meet without seeing some (the more the better) pictures.

2, Try to speak to them on the phone once. Its so much nicer going to meet some one who you know you can have a conversation with & you might even fancy them from the sound of their voice, but.........

3, Never get over involved be it by mail, txt or phone. Its a total waste of time. the only way to work out if you like some one is to meet them.

4, Avoid clingy women like the plague, if she prints a pic of you & sticks it on her wall before you meet, don't ! (man I regret that).

5, Don't travel too far, Now you may think this is cynical but if you go miles out of your way for a date (my record is about 200 miles) then you will be pretty disappointed if it goes wrong. I have yet to work out the ratios but its fair to say that most dates are a one off.

6, Do not meet up with older women in the hope they look young. OK I know one exception to this rule, she is 39 but could honestly pass for 25. In the main though people look their age even if they do look young in that special photo.

7, If you meet a girl & she is good looking but a pain in the ass do yourself a favour and move on. This is man's greatest weakness, the ability to be pussy whipped. My self and friends have put up with ridiculous behaviour from good looking women in the hope of getting laid. Have some self respect!

Late potentials on a saturday night.

I just got a mail from a girl I met on a dating website. She has very similar interests & is pretty good looking. I will call her tomorrow. The problem with net dating is no matter how much you might get on online, you may hate each other in the flesh. It is for this reason that rule 2 must be obeyed "never get over involved before you meet" this may be by phone , mail or dreams......

Also, errr oh yes. I got a reply from a young blonde 24 year old. No I think there is about a 1 in 30 mail to shag ratio. This doesn't stop me from wondering if after a few mails & possibly dates I could be sharing a bed with a relative stranger, what did people do before the internet ?

Who's next (The contenders)

The friends ex, we have & we will again. Its great, we get on, have fun & fancy each other. We gave it a go once but it didn't really work so we moved on. the chemistry is always there & she loves flirting with me. I love fucking her.

Cafe girl, cute young & friendly. Once offered to go out with me & drink vodka (a sure sign ?).

Heels at work, So she comes over & says to me " do you like my heels" (they are about 4") I tell her to put them away. She says "these aren't the high ones, I save them fro the bedroom". On another occasion I tell her we will never shag, she says she isn't so sure & flirts with me daily.

Cute & foreign, she reminds me of "the one I loved" she is so cute & happy but works with me daily. If I here her speak Spanish much more I may crack

Facebook girl, I hope I can stay away but she has sent me pics of her pussy & is offering sex. Just the slightest bit of "I know you not like that with everyone" & I will be doing what ever I want to her. She is stupid enough to think this may lead to a relationship, silly girl..............

Ways of getting laid.........

1, The internet, yes like any sensible young chap I do internet dating. This can lead to sex, boredom or disappointment. Net dating will test your confidence to the edge. Its is unlike normal life with a whole new set of rules. Facebook is offering me one easy shag at present. I don't like her, think she is ugly, slightly unbalanced & bordering on being a slag. I may shag her if I get desperate/horny enough.

2, Work, there are so many 50 ? good looking girls at my work. The work shag count stands at 2 in my present job. 1 shag 1 relationship but there may be more.

3, Female friends, Yes I have shagged them & one young lady is close to being shagged again.

4, Randoms met through day to day life. I don't go out with male firends drinking that much & hardly ever to late clubs etc so this is unlikely. But you never know.......

The facts

I am male 35, 6'2" 14 stone & fairly good looking, I think I am normal but you never really know. I am single & have been on & off for the last 6 years. This means I spend a large part of my time in the pursuit of 3 things. love, sex, happiness. What order of importance these are in varies from day to day so lets have a look.

Love...

I was in love when I was 20, completely totally 100% sit & smile to yourself in love. I dumped her once & later she dumped me & broke my heart. I have felt love a few times since & had a rather full on experience last summer but I tell myself that this doesn't compare to "the real thing".

Sex...

Well its been 8 days & I feel calm, of course this will change if I go cold turkey. In the past I have shagged work colleagues, friends, friends ex girlfriends (once but dam she's great), ugly girls, pretty girls, older 40 ish & younger 20 ish. We are in the mid to upper 20's number wise. I am not fussed with numbers & ready to settle down but I do like sex & dirty too you name it I love it but no toilet stuff thanks.............

Happiness

I am happy now ! this is good thing & has not allways been the case. I have freinds, family & a good job. I have money, interests & a positive outlook. I have no woman but I have happiness, long may it continue...........

The point

So the point of this ? To document a year of dating & maybe more, here I will lay the facts on the screen. I therapeutic diary of mans inner mind.